42 Buying clothes in the supermarket

Remember that rhyme that went round when you were at school? ‘Oh, let’s all go to Tesco’s/ Where [insert victim’s name] buys her best clothes/ La, la, la, la etc?’
Well, unfortunately for you, now that is the truth. Of course, supermarket clothes have come a long way since the 1980s, and we’re certainly not knocking the sartorial delights of Florence & Fred, George at Asda, Sainsbury’s Tu and other similar ranges. In fact, we like them a lot, especially the ones that don’t exploit developing world sweatshop labour too much.

It’s just that there is something a little sad, a little deflated and disappointing, about chucking a new blouse into the trolley alongside a bottle of ketchup and packet of smoked mackerel. Clothes shopping by its very nature should be an indulgent and uplifting experience, even during a credit crunch.
However on-trend and pretty the clothes are, the glaring lights, piped muzak and surly supermarket shop assistants guarantee that, as an experience, shopping in Selfridges this ain’t

Only thing is, if you don’t buy your clothes in the supermarket, you might just never find time to buy any at all. Supermarket clothes shopping enables you to multi-task, something we new mums are good at – and let’s face it, even making it to a supermarket is a treat these days (see also our love affair with Ocado).
Yes, we know there is always Asos.com or Ebay, both brilliant in their own way for those cheap and instant fashion fixes. And, yes, OK, every few weeks there is that obligatory trip to John Lewis/Bluewater, which you now look forward to in the same way you used to look forward to afternoon tea at the Wolesley.
But sometimes we want New Clothes Now, and we want to touch and see them in real-life not as a collection of pixels on a screen. Even if we have no chance of being able to actually try them on – have you ever seen a supermarket changing room that is actually open, even if you had the time to use it?
So. Best clothes. Tesco’s. You know it makes sense.

13 John Lewis

In the old days you shopped at a variety of stores. Some of them sold cool, funky things and some of them played pumping house music in the background while you were in the changing rooms.

But now, much like your parents before you, you only ever shop in John Lewis. It may not be cool. The soft furnishing section may, frankly, look like a room-set from your Great Aunt Gladys’ house.

But John Lewis is safe. It looks after its staff which makes you feel better about shopping there. It has never knowingly undersold. It has a bra-fitting service. And it sells pretty much everything a growing family could need, from baby bouncers to fridge-freezers.

And crucially – and this is the bit that really counts - it has good changing rooms. You can breastfeed in them, you can change your baby’s nappy, hell you can have a full-on, 20 decibel argument with your partner about which baby bouncer to buy within listening range of at least 10 other mothers. Frankly there is really no need to shop anywhere else ever again, so why bother?